Hibernation and Quantum Physics???

Where to start. Well I guess I should thank Miss Ruby for making me come outta my hibernation. Ruby seems to have caught on to a Parallel Universe where I am a Model. I knew I had it in me-- but it took that picture and my reading up on Quantum Physics and the Many Worlds Theory to realize that really is me in that ad!! I don't know how to explain it to my parents-- they just wont understand-- I guess in small in words like- woof and argggg and awrrrrwwrr. Well maybe that last one was a little to big for them.
I would love to have pics in this post, however my dad is out of town and has the camera and my mom can't find the old one. Maybe later this week it will 'show up'.
So... I should also apologize to all my fellow dogg bloggers-- I haven't read a post in over a month! So I have lots to catch up on. I heard there was even a Wedding!!! So I promise I will spend lots of time reading everyone's great wordly exploits.

Bernard

Puppies in the air!!!!

I got the most exciting email this weekend. If you recall a little while back I had posted about my friend Quincy and his passing. He was the bestest Basset Hound anywhere who lived a long life and was extremely loved...well, his parents sent us this!!!!
Seems they are thinking about bringing another great pup into their lives. Just like Oscar's mum and dad, I am sure this decision is a hard one and I am glad they have opened their hearts to this idea. But puppies are the cutest ever and I would have so much to teach their new boy (my cousin)!!Where to start..like how to go big boy pee, sneak lots treaties, potty training, cat humping, begging, telling juicy secrets and of course how to run on the treadmill. I could even show him how to drive a car. I might even be able to show him how to train his parents, although I am still working on mine!! I will keep all you doggs posted on what happens!!!

A new award!!

Balboa is the coolest-- and not because he is also a frenchie-- but because he gave me this!!!! Yeah!!!! I am passing this on to Marvin, Sparky and my new friend Toffee.

My mom is working on the pics from all the party'sover the last few days.. hopefully she will let me post some in the next few days. My parents are still recovering from Vegas-- but they haven't mentioned a word about what they did out there! If I find anything out---I will let the troops know!

Bernard

While my parents are in Vegas...

My parents are in Vegas, hanging out with friends, enjoying the city...I have been let at home, unsupervised...to do what I want (Bernard's mom: Kona's parents are watching him). My mom says shes feels super duper guilty...they have never left me home like this. Usually my grandparents come over to watch and house sit-- which I love!!! They are the bestest in the world. But this time I am at home, and Kona's parents are checking on me-- and bringing me over for playtime. Kona-- who used to be super scared of me!!! We have become friends and I love playing with him. To put my moms mind at ease, I had Kona's mom send some pictures of us:

We started of wrasslin-- always a favorite!!! As you can tell there is a big size difference!He is the biggest Rhodesian I've ever seen (ok, the ONLY one I've ever seen)

Then I thought maybe we should gossip a minute about my parents and 'What goes on in Vegas, stays in Vegas"--hmmmm!!!

Then we wrassled some more...

Then a break was in order-- who all know how quickly I exhaust...

That got me so excited that I took a little 'energy' out on Kona-- he's such a good sport : )Here's a better shot, lol

We rested a minute-- as I tried to explain to Kona what I was -not- doing *wink*

Then i snuck a quickie on the side

I was quite tired after all that

Hope you Dogg's aren't to offended by my pornographic photo's-- but I needed to shock my parents while they were away-- so that they knew I was having a good a time as they were-muahahaha

Bernard

New pups!!

It must be the season-- for new pups!! One of my mom's BFF's had her first people pup. We haven't seen him in person yet--but we just got pictures last night---He is the cutest little thing ever. His name is Jackson--and here he is!!! Congrats to Tina and Daniel

Then later last night i found out my friend Cippo is getting a new fur sister...another IG (Italian Greyhound) of course--a little girl that will be ready to go home next week. Here's a pic of me, Dash and Cippo from earlier this year.

I wish I could report that I am getting one of these--but all i hear is that they are working on it----whatever that means-- I mean come on now-- I am demanding one of these pups NOW peeps!!! I will give you 2 minutes to run to the store and pick one up! Now I said--Geezzzz.

Bernard

My cycling kit has arrived!!!

Well my mom had ordered my cycling kit almost a year ago---and it is finally done!!!I had my final fitting session on Sunday-- it was sooooooo exhausting. Almost 3 hours, laying on a table next to the sewing machine, being propped up to try on the 'shirt' about 500 times. I now know I have the mental astuteness to be a model. It was so tiring...thinking of nothing and staring into space--randomly falling asleep-- then waking up to try on clothes, meet new fans (people coming into the pet store) and signing autographs! I love it, although I think my PR person was tired and hungry. I even inspired a 'nanny' to order one for her granddog--her son rides for H&R Block in Georgia.
My outfit was supposed to be a surprise for my dad at the beginning of the season (Jan/Feb)-- and now the season has ended..even my Italian Greyhounds buddies got theirs before me : (


However, my mom had to tell him when he saw their kits and thought how cool it was.

Don't we look cool!!! Excuse the boy bits-- but mom can't get my 'paw cover' to work right today. So enjoy girls!!!

As a side note--my mom was asleep at the blog wheel when an email came in-- I was Blog of the day-- and I didnt even get to see it!!! It was last week on Sept. 13th--so I know it's too late -- thanks mom-- but here is my award

Bernard

Chilli's Adoption Day Pawty Pics!!!

Well, as every d-o-gg knows I love documenting a good pawty--puparazzi style of course. I had never met Chilli before, but I must say she throws a great party. So here are the photos from a great party, for a great pup, in a great location. Most pups came dressed but later went nekkid!! So I can only post the photos i took from earlier in the evening.
A great photo, before the volley ball pit, mai tai's and craziness

Joey and some great wine-- I didn't know he was a Merlot man!

Bella throwing us the seductive moves--impressive

Boys taking a break from the Volleyball action!

Who knew Tanner had a body-- guess its true about doofus syndrome...no brains equals braun, hehe

Eye Candy courtesy of our dog girls and our hamster friend Girl Girl--we can tell you've been workin out on your 'treadmill'!

A little sail around the water to relax and drink some Mai Tai's-- where are the girls?
The hostess with the mostess (he he) and Ruby our pilot extraordinaire--ok boys- down!

A shout out goes to Ruby for flying those of us needing to travel on Air Ruby!! I wish I could post more-- but as you can see from the last photo-- there wasn't much clothing and it was nekkid all around!

Bernard

Sleeping Arrangements--as requested

So many of you-- ok, maybe just a few doggs-- Wanted to see me in my Mafia sleeping mode, as named by Ruby-- from an earlier post. It took a while for my mom to catch me and for me not to freak out when I heard the camera turn on...

Thn mysteriously enough-- I found a new sleeping position the other day that I have yet to repeat. Maybe I was possessed : ) Good thing for me, my dad caught a few photos. I have covered up my 'big bits' for the sensitive

Night doggs!!!

Bernard

Better late than never...

My mom is sooooooo lazy--- She finally got around to adding music to some videos from LAST weekend. I went to my cousin Sara's house because my dad was racing close by in the Giro di San Francisco (here's my dad's blog post about it) and they wanted to talk cars (Audi's of course)-- we have the bestest time-- her dad Jim (my dad's cousin) gives us pizzles and we get to play all day and night...Sara is the cutest and needs her own blog!! Her parents are super computer savvy...so they have NOOO excuses.

Anyways -- heres us trying to play

And here is me going to town on a pizzle

Bernard

Scategories! I've been Tagged..

My friend Wonder Ruby has tagged me to play this fun game of Scategories---

Here are the rules: Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the questions. They must be real places, names, things ... If you can't think of anything, skip it. You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question. You take the first letter of your first name, and then answer the questions using only that letter.

What is your name? Bernard

4 letter word: Bond

Vehicle: Bentley

TV Show: Bonanza

City: Beverly Hills, Ca

Boy Name: Brandon

Girl Name: Brenda

Alcoholic Drink: Bellini

Occupation: Business Analyst

Something you wear: Berret

Celebrity: Barbara Walters

Food: Bread

Something found in a bathroom: Bottles

Reason for being late: Bad traffic

Cartoon Character: Bugs Bunny

Something You Shout: Behind you!

I know some doggs have already played, but I'm gonna tag Sparky and Kaui & Sumo! Okay that made me really sleepies--It must be time for a nappies!!!!

Bernard

Food, Food and More Foodies!!!

I've been tagged by Suki to tell ya'all about my favorites foods! Well, I will tell you about some of them and SHOW some too! In no particular order<>

Tomatoes- I hope my mom doesn't get in trouble for 'borrowing' this picture

Chelada- Now I know what you are thinking..dogs can't drink alcohol..my dad snuck this one in. He is OBSESSED with tomato juice and beer and seems it is also a Mexican drink. So he no longer has to make them at home and can just open a can now--Who knew there were soo many other people out there with such a perverse taste in beverages.
Peanut Butter- Well, I will eat any kind. However, my mom will only eat crunchy and it HAS to be Laura Scudders. My dad will only eat smooth and it has to Skippy. I really don't see the difference--but it just means there's more peanut butter in the hizzouse!

Cheese-Ok I would sooooooo overdose on this platter if it were really here!

Chicken-Watch and learn-he he

Ok, what doggs want to tell us about their food obsessions-- how about Fig, Frasypoo and Freda--F for Foodies..yum!!!

Middle Name Game

So seems my mom has finally decided to get off her butt and let me post again--I can't believe I went almost 2 weeks-- I know it was hard to be inspired after such great photo ops posts from Simba's 007 party.. but I am back!!!! I started with yesterdays post with Trouble, the $12 million dollar dog. I shall now continue my streak with "The Middle Name Game"



1. Post the rules before you give the facts.
2. List one fact that is somehow relevant to you and your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. When you are tagged you need to write your post using your middle name and facts about it.
4. At the end of your post, choose one dog (or more) to tag for each letter of your middle name. Be sure to let each puppy know she/he has been tagged. (It's okay if you don't do this... tag who you want to tag!)


So my middle name is Hinault...so very French...just like Ruby Bleu, my tagger!!!

H happy-go-lucky
I inquisitive
N no longer 3.5 lbs
A adorable
U unconditional love giver, unbelievably-cute (stealing that one from Ruby)
L loveable, laughable, loud
T treaties anyone??

My taggee's are: Fig, Sophie, Tofu (who's been MIA for as long as I have been), Frasypoo, Clover, Wally, and Simba--Tell us all about you and your middle name!!!!

Hinault

Any girls out there named TROUBLE????

So breaking news today!!!!! Leona Helmsley leaves her girlie dog, Trouble, 12 MILLION dollars. This, although seemingly excessive is just PAWSOME!! After all the bad news about Micheal Vick and his treating us dogs like poop--here's a lady, the queen of mean, who knows who was looking out for her and providing unconditional love! I declare today,

****Will all your money to your Doggs Day*****or maybe *****Princess Trouble Day*****

Bernard "would'a been happy with only 1 million"

More 007 Pawty pics at Simba's

Update: More pictures of last nights festivities at Simba's 007 Pawty

Wally and Stan from the Republic of Gooberstan
Amber doing the oh so seductive-- over the shoulder stare!

I have more I wanted to post--but my mom said we would get in BIG trouble..I guess there was wayyy more debauchery than even Ruby remembered!!!! Maybe I can hire Joe Francis of Girls Gone Wild to publish some of them, he he!!!!

Bernoober

Simba's 007 Pawty Pics

So I am sur eeveryone is Dying to see the pics from Simba's slammin 007 pawty!!! I have exclusive photos from the evening (before it's even over)--these are HOT off the presses my doggs

Here is Ruby Bleu, myself and Suki--I am surrounded by such lovely ladies!!!!

Ok, now hopefully this next one won't upset Balboa too much as it is a pic of Fig and Simba!!!

Here 's (l to r) Fig, Suki, Ruby, me, Boo and Tadpole..oh and Tanner in the wayyyy back! I'm not sure when we all changed clothes, but I am sure theere is a good story behind that one,lol.

Ok, I hope that was enough to tease you all and make all the doggs jealous who didn't go to Simba's ragin pawty... more pics after some more tini's

Bernard

Another fantasy...

This fantasy just proves how ready I am for Simba's 007 house pawty-- whatcha think Ruby??**whoot whoot**

My imaginary vacation with my dad...

Just wanted my dad to not forget about me while he's in Utah--so here is where i think we should go instead-- a dogg can dream can't he???

Tadpole's lost Twin

I was sooo inspired by Tadpole's picture from one of his newer post
that I believe we have found Tadpole's Brother from Another Mother-- Don't ya agree??

The image that flashed thru my brain was an older Brad pic, i think from earlier times-- however this one was close. Such an uncanny resemblance!!!!

Bernard

Guest video appearance...

Now I know this isn't us dogg related but I HAD to share. Ok, how freaky is this.....
These parents were worried about the babysitter they hired, so they hid a camera in their childs bedroom and when they checked the footage what they saw was pretty freaky. Can you see the ghost?



Sitter Cam Catches Ghost - Watch more free videos


Mooahhha hhhhahah!!!!

Bernard

Google Searches....

Ok, my mom has been collecting (slowly) the Google searches that have lead doggs to my blog. I must confess that I am not finding any fun and interesting searches like some of you guys have. Am I EVER going to get past a G rating? Do I need to be writing more about killing stuffies, attempted sex with cats, peeing on things...i just don't know. There isn't a single search I have logged that isn't self explanatory.
1. that's my brother from another mother
2. french bulldog wanted
3. blog french bulldog & french bulldog blog
4. pit bull french bulldog
5. french bulldogs northern california
6. french bulldog motorhome
Do any doggs out there have a strategy that I need to be made aware of? Of course I would love to have a bigger audience...but atleast one wierd,wacky, crazy Google search that led to my blog would be just as nice. Do I need to make my 'labels' more detailed? Im lookin' to my friends here to help in this quest--as I am now on a mission : )

Bernard

All About French Bulldogs (continued)

So Balboa invited me to add to his great post about us Frenchies (he was tagged by Sparky)...I will continue in his same format : ) and add where I can.


A SHORT History: Frenchies were a favorite of Parisian prosititutes and lacemakers (to keep their laps warm)..but eventually charming the upper classes. We even had a famous Frenchie on the Titanic (who was insured for a LARGE amount in those days). Can you imagine the sites our ancestors saw!!! Geezzz!!

Temperment:We are extremely expressive..and yes, as Balboa said we LOVE people, peeps, my doggs...ya know..everyone.

Living Conditions: The range is no less than 45 and no more than 85. Can we say high maintenance. Please see the bill below as proof that my parents make sure I am comfortable in the house. (Bernard's Mom: This is also due to a spoiled husband, who insists on a constant 73, so i have ONLY high maintenence boys in this house! proceed...)



Exercise: Well we all know we can-- it's just do we really want to? Yes, but in moderation.. and for us that is a mere 5 minutes at the dog park before we start making horrible wheezing noises that have been known to be confused with growling. I even had a lady pull her dog away from me one time- scared that I was a mean dog and was growling...lordy!!! I am as dangerous as a baby.



How'd I do Balboa? Can I tag someone now, to talk about their breed. I tag Ruby's and Tofu Burger.

Things I like....

So I have been tagged by Ruby to answer 5 questions about what I like.

1.- Where is your favorite place to sleep?

Well,I have many, depending on what time of the day it is....my internal clock is amazing my mom says.

After I wake up, I like to sleep on my mom's lap with one of my stuffed animals in my mouth:

If it is later in the day I like to lay at the end of the couch facing the front door:

If its after dinner, I am usually on the floor (on the rug of course) facing the front door.

If it is late at night, I reserve right to lay anywhere of the above.

If its bed time, and I am no keeping dad up with my snoring, then its right next to mom so she is enchilada'd between me and Six.

2.- Is there a specific trick your humans make you do to get treats?

I get a treat EVERYTIME i come inside from going potties. They are soo dumb that even when i don't go potties i still get a treat.They are wising up--so I don't know how much longer I can go in and out and still get treats.

3.- If you could spend an entire day doing anything at all with anyone what would do and with whom?

Well I would have to split my time evenly with my parents and have family time.

With my mom i would :run on the treadmill with her, help her make dinner *wink*, play tug o war

With my dad i would: go for a really fast car ride, play 'red light', have him play 'dead dog'

Family time would consist of snuggling on the couch and bed, chasing Six and Munch and getting to try their food, DOG PARK, watching The Dog Whisperer and Bull Riding

4.- What is your favorite toy?

Well this would have been WAYYYYYY easier before the CUZ-- but now I am very torn. I plead the 5th.

5.- If you could change one thing in your life, what would it be?

In keeping with Ruby's theme--definitely the Bee Sting incident

So now I get to tag 3 doggs-hmm... how about my new friend's Coco and Casper and Kaui

CUZ or not to CUZ

I can finally say----'I cuz'----can you believe it!!! My mom finally got hip to the whole CUZ thing. If you remember one of my first posts--I had been so deprived, I didn't even know what a Cuz was. Joe Stains, Tadpole, Toby and Reina will be sooooo proud of me!!!!

I was at Petsmart, which i hadn't been to in a while--and saw bad cuz,good cuz, dino cuz--

i couldn't make up my mind---but--finally deciding on a medium bad cuz--cuz i am so badd..he he he.

I love the way it bounces and squeaks--I am not sure if it will replace the Ruby's frog--but this will get some good 'quality' time with me..I am sure of it.

The little horns are the cutest, but the feet are the best part---maybe I am starting to have a foot fetish??

Bernard :)

My friend Quincy

I guess when it rains it pours. I found out that my first and best friend in the natural world passed away today. He was a proud basset hound who, unlike me, decided not to blog but rather watch over his parents and their home and I looked up to him for that. I always got so excited when we got to go visit him. I am so sad for his parents because he made them so happy everyday and I am sorry for the pain they are going through.
I know I am a better dog because I knew Quincy.
Thank you for everything Quincy. I will miss you.
Bernard.

Weekend in Reno

Here I am on my 'road trip' to Reno for the Northern California District Championships for my dad's cycling. I usually start offf excited--but then I settle in and like to ride like this...
then i lay down and nap....it took forever to get to my dads parents house outside Reno. They have a great house with tons of space to pee and even watch cows : )

On Saturday we met my dad at the road race and took the g-parents motorhome....ok, can i say that is the only way I want to travel now---

Isn't this the life!! That's my g-pa Joe. Don't we look alike? The road race didn't go so well for dad--but I had a blast!! S0, we went home and g-pa had a suprise!! He set up race course just for us

You wont see a picture of me sorry to say...my legs wouldn't reach. But that's ok-- I needed to rest :)

My next photo I took for Balboa-- does this remind you of anything??

Sunday went much better, except my dad got caught in a crash and had to race against the Discovery Masters Team-- with like 7 guys-- and he had only 1 guy on his team at the race---but he still placed in the top 10--so we were proud of him..we know he wanted to win---maybe next year!!Here's the finish--we think he was 5th.

I leave you all with a pic from this weekend-- that apparently was funny to everyone but me---too small???too big???

Bernard